Dear Rose, please forgive me for ever saying that you are a useless grey rag. It’s just not true: you happen to be quite a useful grey rag and I am enormously proud of you. For the third time in your, what, 15? 16 is it now? years, you caught and killed a mouse. And you neatly laid it in front of the door I use most often, what a good girl you are!
Now if only you could figure out how to make me coffee. Or toast, that’s easy.